Henry Fool poem competition – Bessie


Here’s my entry to the Agoraphobic Reviewer poem-off with a Henry Fool theme. Of course, having insider information as I don’t, I can’t confirm that the following poem isn’t in fact the actual poem that Simon wrote and that Henry championed.


The winds were bitter,
The air unstill,
And the PE teacher’s face,
Held the darkest chill.
But on that lonely woodland path,
I held you aloft,
As we trudged,
From vale to croft.

Splashing through puddles,
I gasped and whined,
To keep your pace,
And stare.
At your grand, jubbling, ocean-like behind.

The other boys may mock,
Or ignore you,
But you stiffen my cock.
And in my dreams I implore you,
To make my shorts messy.


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9 Responses to “Henry Fool poem competition – Bessie”

  1. oldrope Says:

    This entry made me hoot at the end. It conjured up images of my own youth. JLB’s entry, by contrast, made me barf up eggs. I have not eaten eggs of late, splain that Baptiste you sick bastard.

  2. johnlebaptiste Says:

    Sensual! I want to know more about Bessie. I want to know less about your penis than I do now.

    OR: those weren’t eggs. They were legs. Dogs’ legs.

  3. oldrope Says:

    That would make more sense, yes

  4. johnlebaptiste Says:

    These poems are ace. We should start some kind of travelling poetry circus, and visit schools and old folks homes.

  5. Banjo Fett Says:

    Not dogs’ eggs? Because I’ve eaten one of those before and it made me very ill.

  6. oldrope Says:

    Dont put all your dogs in one basket, Fett. As for the troupe, I am all for it, though I should warn you I have previous for entering nursing homes and reciting ‘poetry’. Still, I have two more strikes, let’s make em count.

  7. johnlebaptiste Says:

    Haw! I love it.

  8. oldrope Says:

    Whither the contributions from our colleagues. Do your managerial duty JLB

  9. johnlebaptiste Says:

    I’ve offered them all the riches of heaven and I’ve threatened them with all the torments of hell but so far it doesn’t seem to have had any effect. I really should have listened when I went to that leadership skills weekend in Ipswich, instead of vomiting continuously and trying to throw myself out of the window.

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